


Coffee and Wolverine

by your_cringy_father



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: M/M, Sympathetic Patton, Sympathetic Remus, also if this doesnt make sense im sorry, anyway this is called me throwing my trauma onto remus, but if you drink coffee without anything else and ur nuts its a bad mixture, its very much a me issue, the only valid writers are the ones who throw their problems on others to deal with, why are there no good tags for remus pls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-01
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2020-07-28 08:13:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20060836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/your_cringy_father/pseuds/your_cringy_father
Summary: Not actually about Wolverine*Remus had been chilling out for the most part but for some reason decided today was a good day to go fucking batshit crazy. Logan's on the case to figure out why.Alternative title; Aromantic writer loves romance but doesn't know how to write it because he's never felt it





	Coffee and Wolverine

**Author's Note:**

> Two in one day! I found this in my drafts and just added a nice ending. Shout out to me for actually finishing something!
> 
> Trigger warnings: (Check tags) intrusive thoughts, lots of wild action for no reason, grounding someone, eating plates, just be careful. 
> 
> Excuse the weird tense if it gets fucked up, I'm for some reason very bad at that. Also someone wrote a fic about Remus writing out his intrusive thoughts rather then acting on them and I 100% stole that kudos to whoever thought of that-- its brilliant.

Remus had been acting chaotic. 

Not that this was anywhere beyond normalcy, Remus often had outbursts of nonsensical rubbish just to get it out of his head, or violent actions (now towards plastic dummies instead of real people) to feel more at peace with his thoughts.   
But he had, or at least they had thought he had, significantly improved since his first day in the house. 

He had even indulged Logan in learning to write out his impulsive thoughts rather then act on them and cause a disturbance in the mind’s process.

Nowadays he was simply more of an energetic terrier dog then the scary boogeyman he had made himself out to be.   
Even Virgil had been found having calm discussions about ‘emo-tastic’ topics as Roman had described it. 

But today seemed to be one of those exceptions. 

The second he was out in the commons, Remus seemed dead set on making sure everyone knew he was there.  
Boisterous and nosy, he threw himself into anything the others were doing. 

And Logan meant that partially literally. 

He had placed his whole hand into Patton’s oatmeal because he “wanted to see if it felt anything like guts”. 

He threw himself in Virgil’s lap, waking the rather exhausted side and creating a quick flurry of arguments that Roman had to break up. 

He tried to take a bite out of the sofa Patton was sitting on, then followed it up with nearly an hour of back to back discussion on why the Cats (2019) movie was a digital masterpiece simply because it had given him so many good ideas about sexual positions as cat puns.

(One of them was just Cat style which Logan is pretty sure is doggy style, but with cat in front of it.) 

It was all just too ‘in your face’.  
Had Remus relapsed in his bad habits? 

Was Thomas being particularly PG-13 today?

Did one of the sides say something on purpose?

No, no, and definite no. 

Remus didn’t seem to have a particular bias towards any of his victims this morning, just whomever seemed available for some chaos with their coffee.   
Logan had noted most of his actions before, being the main ‘handler’ of Remus while Deceit was out. Just the same as they were before, which he thought they had bypassed in his recovery. 

(He wasn’t sure how he got the title of caretaker, by the way, but after taking three physical hits from Remus and making no reaction beyond a monotone and sarcastic, “ouch”, the others had apparently non-verbally deemed him worthy of the ‘privilege’ of caring for Roman’s Tinkerbell reject twin)

And yet Remus bounded across the walls and floors, turning things upside down just to see them revert back seconds later.   
Carved bad words into the walls to watch them refill and disappear as if they never happened.   
This, well, frustrated him like it had never done before.

Of course, nothing the Duke did stayed physical for very long.  
Throwing knives into Logan’s back or tossing the television out the window simply led to small stutters before the objects were removed or replaced. 

Thomas, since accepting the side, had made it nearly impossible for the Duke to have any permanent damage done to the conscious mind they inhabited.

Yet it still, validly, got on everyone’s nerves when Remus had a moment like this.

It wasn’t until Remus tore up the couch cushion for the seventh time, already driven Roman and Virgil from the shared space, that Patton decided to step in; “Alright! That’s enough! Remus, we’re kicking you from the commons until you’ve cooled down.” the moral side said stiffly, his dad-voice in high gear. 

“Cooled down? Why, I’m barely burning hot enough for that!” And before Patton realized his mistake, Remus doused himself in flames.   
“This is fine!” The Duke squeaked and examined his nail beds as if nothing peculiar was happening. 

Patton huffed, done keeping his cool; “You’re grounded mister! For the rest of the day!” He puffed up his cheeks, like he was trying to look bigger than the mass of burning limb and cotton called Remus. 

The flames quickly extinguished, eyebrows raised.

Remus seemed shaky for a moment, jaw clenched. But stood up and flashed a daring grin to Logan and Patton, before he walked back up the stairs and left the room in silence again. 

Patton immediately cracked, “Was that too harsh?” 

Logan restrained himself from snorting and said “Hardly, but it was necessary. I’m not quite sure why he suddenly returned to old habits.” 

“He’s acting like a toddler on seven cups of caffeine.” Patton sighed. He ran a hand through his hair, clearly stressed by his need to discipline Remus. 

For a moment, Logan pitied him. Having taken on the role as ‘father’ in their ‘family’, he was often the first to act, or at least the first expected to act, when it came to rambunctious sides. A pang of guilt ran through Logan when he realized maybe he should have done something first, considering his level head. 

Then it all washed away under a realization. He turned in his chair to point to Patton, who straightened and look back at Logan with a curious look. 

“What did you say?” 

“... Was I too harsh?” 

“No, after that.” 

“Oh-- he’s acting like a toddler on seven cups of caffeine? Maybe that was mean, I didn’t really mean it--” Patton backpedaled, a little red in the face. 

Logan quickly shook his head and stood up, walking over to the kitchen and opening a cabinet over the oven, and a small smile grew on his lips when he realized the issue.

“Not harsh at all, Patton. In fact, I believe you were wholly accurate.” 

He found Remus in his room, surprisingly.   
He didn’t actually expect the Duke to follow Patton’s orders, considering his unnaturally wild nature often clashed with Patton’s rigid morals. 

But when he knocked, not expecting a response, on Remus’ barnacle and damp wood door, it opened tentatively. 

Remus was changed into casual clothing, a large dark green shirt, covered in rips and grease stains, and big black boxers (Logan was kind of glad he had at least that on. He’s definitely seen him with less). Seeing him in pedestrian clothing was a shock to Logan's system, and caused some side affects he definitely didn't think were appropriate right now. Though he didn't know when it was the right time to mentally remark the slight uprising of fabric around the bottom of Remus' torso, showing off the bone in his hips, or the sleepy hooded look in his eyes that was bearing deep into his skin. He quickly decided to ask him about that later, instead pushing himself to the point. 

However he hardly had the chance before Remus interrupted him. 

“Professor X,” Logan quickly assumed that was him, “What the hell are you doing at my door?” Remus snarled, obviously on the offense from the act in the living room.

“I thought Deceit told you to give up caffeine.” Logan said, ignoring the question entirely.

And Remus’ face fell. 

“He did.” 

“And yet…?” Logan gestured to Remus with a hand, now noticing the jittery flicking movements of his hands and curling of his toes. 

“I don’t know.” He hummed, his gaze now jumping from one of Logan’s shoulders to the other, maybe to avoid eye contact, maybe to just make up for the energy, “I had some ideas last night, I wanted to get them down on paper. I simply fell asleep too quickly! The cries of the innocent will do that to you.” He said, shrugging and gesturing to the noisemaker behind him. Instead of white-noise spilling from it’s speakers, however, it was random screams of pain. That was a new one. 

“So, coffee!” Remus grinned, eyes wide. Logan’s eyes narrowed, that couldn’t just be it though, could it?

“Have you eaten yet today?” 

And, there we go. Logan hit the nail on the head. 

Remus was actively fighting the urge to shut the door, block out Logan and forget this conversation ever happened, he knew it. He could see the conflict on his face between letting him in, emotionally, or blocking him out, both literally and emotionally. 

Logan made the first move, letting his hand rest cautiously on his shoulder. 

“It’s okay. You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to explain. Just please come downstairs and get something to eat with us. And, uh, try not to ruin the cushions.” 

Remus nodded, for once at a lost for a clever quip. He allowed himself to be pulled down the stairs, and into the kitchen. Logan directed him towards the kitchen’s bar table, and Remus sat on one of the stools to watch Logan cook. 

Still, the caffeine had its moments. Remus randomly saying some blurb about knives, fingers digging hard into the counter to keep himself from acting out.

And when Logan finally placed a sandwich in front of him, he ate it all down quick-- plate and all. 

Literally. 

He got down a cup of water as well, and a look of peace dawned on the Duke. One that came from something other then pure black Folgers coffee running through your veins. 

“Are you feeling sufficiently relaxed now?” Logan inquired, eyebrows raised. 

Remus let a Cheshire grin curl across his features, “When am I ever, Wolverine? But I’m feeling strong enough to lift a couch again!” He cackled and sat up, before immediately blinking in surprise and sitting back down. 

“Maybe later.” He grumbled, wincing as his head probably swirling from the vertigo of standing up too quickly. 

Logan snorted, but collected the remnants of the plate and tossed them in the trash. 

He eyed the other side with a gleam in his eye, watching him behave calmly for once.   
With his muscles all relaxed and smoothed out, Logan would dare say he looked rather stunning in the eye-shadow he wore near daily. 

Oh no. 

He excused himself, walking out of the kitchen and hiding behind a wall just out of Remus’ eyesight. Logan let out a long breath, feeling his cheeks heat up. He almost resented the emotions, already aware of their cause. But as Logan head leaned back against the wall, and he heard the soft humming from the kitchen, he knew he was on a track with no return to be seen. 

Well, this was certainly not going to end well for him.


End file.
